5K Fun

I did my first 5K on Sunday.  My mom came up and we did it together.  She usually does the Turkey Trot close to our hometown with one of my sisters.  But that sister lives out of state now and won't make it back.  So I set out to find a 5K to do around Thanksgiving.

We did the Gobbler Grind in Overland Park.  My sister did it with us long distance.  We called her when we started and periodically throughout.  So that was pretty fun.  What was not fun though?  The weather.  The first time I checked the weather for Sunday it was supposed to be in the 30s with a chance of precipitation.  Like snow and rain.  I was out.  I will be cold but not wet and cold.  Well, then I checked it the next day and the weather said in the low 50s.  Perfect.  So we paid our $35 each and signed up.  The closer we got, the colder the forecast got.  When we left my house Sunday morning it was a brisk 13 degrees.  Um, that's too cold for anything.

But my mom and I are tough (or stupid??) so we persevered.  It started late so we headed back to the car for a few minutes to warm up.  Or at least not freeze our toes off.  We headed back to the starting line with about 2 minutes left before we started.  So there wasn't too much standing around.  As soon as we started I wished I had gone to the bathroom one more time.  Being cold made me need to pee.  But I made it.  And we finished.  Not fast, but we got it done.  And we walked, we are not runners (even though I'm tossing around the idea of running a half marathon with my sister...) especially not in the cold. 

 

That time is a little off because we started at the back of the pack.  So, I felt pretty good about it.  It was honestly the fastest I've ever done that distance.  And we weren't dead last so I felt good about that.

And my sister sent me a Starbucks gift card so we could go out for a post 5K hot beverage to thaw out our poor frozen selves.  Yum!

 

What did you guys do this weekend?  Whatever it was, I hope it involved staying warm and cozy!  I still am fighting the urge to put up my tree.  I picked up some new lights yesterday but am coming down with a cold so that was as far as I got.

Twenty

This post is brought to you by the exercise bike, treadmill, and a jug of water.  And very little chocolate.

So, I stepped on the scale this morning and I have officially lost 20 pounds!!!!  I'd been stuck at 17 for the longest time.  And I was so frustrated.  I'd been eating super healthy and working out usually at least 6 days a week.  Well this week I didn't work out Monday or Tuesday because we were processing deer.  I got back on the treadmill on Wednesday and I had a serious break through.  And then I biked the fastest 10 miles I'd ever done yesterday.  I felt absolutely great.

Then weighing in this morning just topped it all off.  I shouldn't brag, but I am just so darn proud of myself.  I keep feeling like 20 pounds isn't that much, but when I think about it I know it is.  And I know I should be proud because I've worked really hard.  I still have a long way to go but I feel like I can do it.

I have on jeans today that were way too small this time last year and they're hanging off my butt.  I need to go shop my skinny closet again.  It's just a great feeling.  I have a laundry basket full of clothes to get rid of.  I mean it's just the best.

I have so much more energy.  I actually look forward to eating the healthy food I pack for lunch and breakfast.  I crave water.  I miss it when I don't go to the gym, I never thought I'd say it, but I really like working out.  Like a lot.

So that explains my lack of DIY and crafty projects.  I've been too busy going to the gym to get my craft on.  I'm hoping to whip up a drop cloth table cloth this weekend in preparation for Thanksgiving.  What are you guys up to?  Let me live vicariously through your holiday crafts!

Some Ideas

Oh boy.  It's just over a week until Thanksgiving and I have done nothing to get ready.  Okay, maybe that's not completely true.  I started pre-cleaning a couple weekends ago, but that barely counts.  So it's possible that I'm beginning to panic a bit.  

My husband is off this week because it's deer season in Missouri.  So, pretty much a holiday.  I had big plans of organizing and cleaning in the evening.  But, he shot a deer yesterday morning and now my fridge is absolutely full of deer meat waiting to be processed.  So it looks like we'll be spending at least the next couple of evenings doing that.  I'm not complaining, I'm definitely thankful for the meat.  But Saturday is going to involve much more cleaning than I had originally planned.

 

My hubby and his deer, an 11 point buck.

So, this is basically a brain dump of what has to get done by this weekend.  I know, Thanksgiving isn't until next week but my parents are coming up this weekend so my mom and I can do a 5K on Sunday so the house needs to be ready.

Um, here's the list.

• Buy a turkey.  I know, I know.  I can't believe it either.  But I can't buy a turkey until there's space in the fridge.  So that means deer processing like maniacs.  We're planning to smoke the turkey.  Cross your fingers for us!
• Figure out the table situation.  Our table only seats four...  I may run to Lowes or HD to get wood cut and make a leaf for the table.  Especially if my dad will be there on Sunday to fine tune the fitting of the leaf.
• Buy a table cloth for whatever table we end up with.  And maybe cloth napkins.  How am I 30 years old and own zero cloth napkins?  I fail at being a grown up.
• Drag out the china.  If I have china, I'm darn well going to use it.  And since it's in the cabinet above the fridge, this is definitely a job for when the hubby is at home to help.
• Clean clean clean like a crazy woman.  The house isn't in bad shape, but I need to do some of those things that I don't do every week.  Like cobwebs.  Ug.
• This is embarrassing... but I need to count my silverware and make sure I have enough place settings.  I started with 8 place settings but somehow I'm not sure I have enough...
• And then there's the other cooking.  We're doing the turkey and I'm making sweet potatoes and rolls.  I'm also making maybe rolls or another side and a chocolate pie to take to my in-laws so that will all be next Wednesday.

What are you guys working on for Turkey Day?  Anybody else starting to panic just a tiny bit?  Or want to come over and help me  make a table leaf?

On Cutting Back

I love Pinterest.  I really really do.  But it's become a serious problem.  I've become obsessed.  I don't even want to tell you how many times a day I check Pinterest.  It's truly embarrassing.  Not only does it cost me to waste too much time, I always come up feeling inadequate. I end up feeling like what I have and what I do is never enough.  And I hate that feeling.

So I'm challenging myself.  I'm going to take a Pinterest break until the new year.  I know, I just heard all the air suck out of the room from shock.  But I feel like looking at Pinterest always causes me to spend money I don't need to spend and buy/make things I don't really need.  So this is going to be a holiday of simplifying.  I know, yesterday I had all these ornaments I wanted to buy.  But instead, I think I'm going to work with what I've got.

So, there's a new plan for Christmas.  I'm not going to buy any new decorations.  I'm going to use everything I already have.  With one exception.  I am going to buy some white lights with white cords for our tree.  I'm just sure that the green cords are going to look horrible on the white tree.  Other wise, it's all what's already in the house.  This isn't to say I won't make anything new, it's just to say I won't spend any money.  Anything I make has to come from existing supplies.

 

I just, I don't know.  I feel like it's all too much.  I've gotten so sucked into making my holidays Pinterest worthy that I've lost the holiday itself I think.  So this year I'm going to strive to not make myself crazy.  I'm going to decorate and have fun but I'm going to focus less on what I want and more on what I'm blessed to have.

So I'm going to walk away from Pinterest until the new year.  I'm going to read more books.  Be more purposeful.  Enjoy conversations.  And not worry so much about what I might be missing online but instead focus on what's in real life.

How bout you guys?  Anybody else feeling the Pinterest pressure?  

Christmas Plans

Oh man, I am so ready to dig out my Christmas tree.  I'm extra excited this year because we have a brand spanking new white Christmas tree.  This will either be the very best or horribly worst tree purchase I've ever made. 

You may remember I broke my Christmas tree last year.  Yup, you read that right.  I broke it.  Not like it was a huge loss considering it cost $15 almost ten years ago.  And it was a 6 foot tree, so obviously very real looking and high quality.  I was pulling the garland (or tinsel as I like to call it) off my tree and yanked too hard and the whole dang tree came crashing down.  On top of me.  I broke the whole base.  Well, when you wait until New Years Day to take down your tree, there are not a lot of trees left to buy when you go to replace it on January 2.  Thus the white tree.  Still only 6 feet tall but lots fluffier and it was only $20.  I'm super cheap.  I want a tall tree, but I don't want to pay a tall tree price.  Cheap.

But I'm pretty excited to decorate with my new tree.  And I'm pretty sure I'm going to be making some new ornaments.  Like I literally cannot wait to go to the store and buy a huge package of the clear ball ornaments and just go crazy.  But I'm making myself wait.  I'm hosting Thanksgiving this year for my family and that will make me crazy enough without adding in Christmas crafts.

But, this is what I'm thinking.
-A few beach inspired ornaments like these.  Complete with sand and shells from our Florida vacation.
-Maybe some cute sparkly monogram ones like these.  Because you can just really never have enough glitter.
-And some filled with glitter like this or this.  Or even some glittered styrofoam balls reminiscent of my childhood.  I may have a glitter addiction.  My husband totally loves it...  Or maybe not.
-I also love these that are just filled with paint.  Obviously, not literally filled with paint.
-And I'm thinking some other randomly filled ornaments with tinsel or feathers would be super cute.

I'm also thinking any of these would be great to give as gifts.  Pretty sure the person I have for Secret Santa at working will be receiving a couple.

And just for fun, here's a quick flashback to Christmases of past.

 

Our mantle the first Christmas in our house.  I was super excited to have a mantle to decorate! 

   

Front door wreaths.  Unless I get super creative, these will be the same this year.

  

Looking at our tree up close, I'm reminded it was definitely time for a new tree.  But I love the pretty silver and gold.  It's also seeming not very decorated...  Strange.

 

The whole tree/mantle last year.  I loved how it looked.  But apparently precariously perching your tree on the hearth and a crate is not the best idea ever.  Lesson learned.

Anybody else dying to decorate for Christmas?  Or maybe you already have.  Like I said, I'm hosting Thanksgiving for the first time ever so get ready for some panic posts about Thanksgiving prep.  Any tips for first time holiday hosters?  I kinda feel like it's a lot of pressure for everything to be perfect. 

Because You're Worth It

I love the blogging community.  I have come across so many talented, thoughtful people that have inspired me.  One of those is Roo over at NeonFresh.  She seems like just the sweetest girl and has some seriously adorable kiddos.  If you're not reading her blog, you should be.  Go there now.  I can wait.....

So, the other day she blogged about Regina George-ing yourself as a mom.  Well, I'm not a mom.  I have a dog but in my world that doesn't count.  So, at first I thought:  great post but it doesn't really apply to me.  Oh, but it does.

If you've been around even half a minute, you know I'm trying to lose weight.  Have been for years.  Ug.  And I totally say things to myself I would never say to a friend and a friend would never say to me.  I know it's my defense mechanism.  If I make the self-deprecating comment about my weight, if I beat them to the punch, people won't say anything about it.

Except when it backfires...  And then it sticks in your mind forever.  Once upon a time I was a camp counselor.  We were doing staff training and I was out at the climbing/rappelling tower doing some kind of training.  I was working with a guy I had been friends with for a while.  I made some off-handed comment about being the "fat kid" or something like that.  And he made a comment back about my weight.  That's when I punched him.  The only person I have ever hit.  Then I told him to, um, f* off.  And I stormed off.  It was halfway through the summer before I went back to talking to him or going out for beers after work with him.  I was mad.  I was hurt.  I could say those things but other people could not.

 

Thinking I am really fat...  Turns out I wasn't.  Also oddly edited to block out kids faces and the name of the camp...

So, if I was so mad that my friend had made that kind of comment to me, why do I feel okay doing it to myself?  I shouldn't.  As a school counselor I spend my days telling girls that they are good enough.  That they are fine just the way they are.  And yet, I myself am telling myself I'm fat and not good enough.

But how do I stop?  I guess I have to start believing what I tell these girls.  I am good enough.  So what if I'm not perfect.  I'm working really hard.  I've ended (hopefully) the days of sitting on my butt after work, watching TV and eating junk food.  I feel great about working out.  I feel great when I make healthy food choices.

And sometimes I think back to high school.  I know, why would I do that?  But, even back then I thought I was fat.  I was always trying to lose weight.  I remember buying my prom dress my junior year and thinking, if only I was 10 pounds lighter I would look so much better.

 

Prom my senior year.  I would love the be the size I was back then, back when I started thinking I was fat.  Also, my dates face is blurred out in case he grows up to be president one day.

I told myself I was fat for so long that it became almost a self-fulfilling prophecy.  I just kept gaining weight.  I would sort of aimlessly try to lose weight but never really have much success.  I'd lose a few pounds but then celebrate by going out for Chinese.  Counter-productive.  But then 30 hit.  And something clicked.  When my husband and I have kids I want to have the energy to play with them like crazy.  I want to go to the lake with my in-laws and not feel ashamed of how I look.  I want to feel good in my skin.

 

I used to like this dress until I saw this picture.  I think this was my wake up call.

The negative self-talk hasn't stopped.  But it's getting better.  Since my 30th birthday I've lost around 17 pounds.  It doesn't feel like a lot.  When people compliment me that I've lost weight and look good, it's still hard for me to believe them because I know I still have a long ways to go.  But every day that I hit the gym on my way home from work I feel so proud of myself and I know that I'm making progress.  And that maybe it's not about being skinny, that it's about being healthy and feeling good.  The other day I biked 15 miles, the longest I'd ever done.  And I felt so crazy proud of myself.  And I didn't feel like that fat girl who felt bad for herself, I felt like I had just kicked serious ass.

So I just keep telling myself what I remind my high school girls, "You are good enough.  You are worth it.  You are perfect just the way you are."  And then I remind myself to not tack on, you'd be better though if you lost more weight.  And it's going to take all the courage I have to throw all this out there.  But, I am good enough and I am worth being healthy for.  Healthy is what matters.  So, I'm just going to keep telling myself that I'm worth it and if I say it long enough, it's going to happen.  And I will quit being so hard on myself.  Because, I'm worth that too.