A Break

I'm taking a little blog break.  We are going on vacation in a couple of days so our house is a disaster.  Piles of clothes.  Trying to get packed.  The bathroom counter is covered in travel sized bottles.  It's a hot mess.  I've been working on packing all week.  I've called it pre-packing.  You know, when you try on all the clothes in your closet to decide what's cute enough to take on vacation.  And then you make little piles of outfits.  And lists.  There have been lots of lists.

There have been other life factors getting in the way of blogging as well.  Some of them fun.  Going to get pedicures with my mother-in-law and sister-in-law.  Hanging out with my older sister.  Going to lunch and to pick up an exercise bike with a good friend this afternoon.  And then one not so fun.

Sunday when we got home from Father's Day festivities with the in-laws, I found out my grandpa wasn't doing well, was in the hospital and was being moved to a hospice house and that it was just a matter of time.  Moments later I found out he had passed away.  A couple of months ago, he and my grandma moved to Colorado to live with their youngest daughter.  When they left, I cried the ugly cry because I knew it would likely be the last time I saw him.  He wasn't in the best of health.  I just get choked up every time I think about it.

They are not my grandparents by blood relation.  They are an even better kind of grandparent, the kind that chooses you.  They've been family friends my whole life.  We've actually known their family longer than that. They are a family my mom has always known.  We've gone to church together my entire life.  I dated their grandson when we were in college.  Even after he and I parted ways, they made it  very clear that I was still their granddaughter and they wanted me around.

At my wedding, they sat in the seats of my grandparents.  I think it meant a lot to both of us.  They are really two of my favorite people in the world.  And just the best people ever.  My grandma always introduces me to people as her granddaughter and people look so confused, they know both of our families and know that there is no actual family connection.  Well, there is but it's way distant and most people wouldn't know that.  But, as far as we're all concerned, they are my grandparents.  And it just makes my heart sad that he is gone.

I know in my head that he is in a better place and no longer in pain.  And that he's up there in heaven with all these other wonderful people that have passed away too and that they're all just so happy to be there together and he's smiling down on all of us.  But it's still hard to make it feel okay.

So, in light of that, all these big projects seem kind of frivolous.  So, I'm taking a little time to just feel kind of sad.  It's getting better.  It's getting easier.  So I'm okay.  It's just always hard to lose someone you love.

And then there's vacation prep.  So, I'll be back after next week.  And hopefully back into project mode.  I'll have lots of pictures of fun in the sun.  And hopefully a tan and a lighter heart.  And speaking of lighter things, I'll have a run down of this amazing diet I did.  I'm ten pounds lighter.  Hot dog!